I am not my pain

Pain can destroy who we are.

It can often feel as though it comes along like a thief in the night and takes away part of ourselves. It creeps into the deepest crevices of our beings, then wears us down until there is virtually nothing left. It destroys who we are.

That can happen. But only if we allow it to.

I am not my pain, poem, E. Sirrell, Despite Pain

It is so important to remember that there is more to us than pain.

I am not my pain

You are not your pain.

It may be part of your life. But it is not you. And you cannot let it take over and become you.

despite pain, I am not my pain. Pain is part of my life, but it is not me.

Look in a mirror

Look at that face looking back at you.

Look into those eyes.

Look really deeply.

Try to look beyond the pain.


Keep looking and smile at your reflection.

See how your eyes change when you smile?

That’s the real you.

You are still there, despite your pain. 

Remind yourself of who you are.

  • Who do you love?
  • What are your hobbies?
  • What’s your favourite book?
  • What’s your favourite music?
  • What kind of movies do you enjoy?
  • Where is your favourite place to visit?
  • Who are the people you love to visit most?

Now find those people you love and hug them. Get back to a hobby, or start a new one. Pick up that book or watch a movie. Play some music. Get out of the house and go to that favourite place or visit those favourite people.

Look around you and find things to make you smile every day. Find yourself. Bring yourself back.

Don’t allow your pain to  destroy who you are.

You are not your pain.

Thank you for reading this post.
Did it resonate with you? Do you feel as though you’ve lost part of  yourself. Please leave a comment and click the follow button to receive updates when I post.


23 thoughts on “I am not my pain

  1. Steve

    I found hot water I mean to the put of scouring the skin on top of the head and neck area. Letting your sinuses run and clearing them out over and over tell most of the mucous is gone gives a little relief, when it’s almost unbearable with no ways of relief. I found that a antibiotic with carbmazepin 200 mg. The dosage as needed, has given me almost nonexistent pain. Remember this was caused by a wound by extrication or a needle or whatever damage to a nerve. So in my case and that’s the case I know intimately as nobody has any real idea of this affliction other then those whom are living it. Nobody I mean no doctor, unless he has it even understands the relentless pain and despair it can create. My cocktail I describe to you is my blessing and hopefully every person that try’s it, there’s. Also I believe with what I take the antibiotic is imperative. Remember some form of trauma put this in motion. Also if it matters one day is overwhelming or a instance of one attack is enough to never be forgotten. I have over 4 years of this, the words I want to use are cuss words and negative words but I don’t want to use that I’m trying to help not hinder. I’m sure we all at some time have let the words fly and damed god and existence. I stumbled onto something or was blessed and hopefully for no relapse and hopefully help for one and all that is suffering with this life changing I guess I’ll call it “a injury”

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Essie Goff

    I am not the same since TN and Facial Pain got it when i was 20 and Now 40 . I feel after some reflection and self helf that it is my Toughest life challenge that i battle with every day. It tryed to define me but i fought back and refuse to let it. I attend my hospital help group to let people just diagnosed know there not alone and that they are stronger than they realise. Its not easy by no means but one day at a time.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Without a doubt, it’s not easy, Essie, and all we can do is take it one day at a time. Every day can be different and bring something new to the table. But we try. I’m glad your hospital group is helping.


  3. Anonymous

    Oh, my! I was explaining TN to my new family (daughter’s boyfriend’s parents and extended family) at Thanksgiving yesterday. I was telling them this exact thing, and how I wish I had the words to encourage those in the support groups who often do not seem to have any hope or “bright side.” Thank you so much for this! Yes, we live with this pain every single day, but we also get a chance to live and love! Mine is bilateral, with a failed mvd on the right, and a recent mvd on the left with minimal results. Anesthesia delorosa to boot!Three children and left for someone another woman. Life isn’t easy, but it is a gift I cherish each and every day!!! Thank you again for your words of encouragement to all! 😊 Much love and many blessings to you!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks for your lovely comment, Allison. You’re exactly right, we should cherish each and every day. It’s definitely not easy, but somehow, if we work at it, we can get through it.


  4. Pingback: Ten Good Intentions to Carry into the New Year – Despite Pain

  5. I am so glad you decided to share one of your brilliant poems Elizabeth and combined it with self-care. I agree we are not our pain but it just a bit part of our lives and I use questions like yours daily to remind myself I can be more than a chronic illness 💜


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